Its meaning from the dictionary : noun [C] the state of feeling less important, clever, successful, etc than other people [] kompleks rendah diri.

Inferiority complex

Okay, maybe i am not suffering from it. This is extreme low self-esteem! Still, i just wanna say that it really does exist in this world, and there are possibilities of our friends going through that. It would be really difficult to think, to smile, to talk. Thank you, Lord, for those people who help them.

That’s what i’ve been hearing a lot the last week. "As if I don’t know", I reply. That, is in my head, of course. How would I sound being so ungrateful of their caring repetitive reminders. I actually have been studying lately, *gasp*. Yea, but it’s not a lot, at least it’s slightly beneficial. I’m glad that I’m not only revising Sejarah now. It gets boring but if compared to Geografi…AARGH I BELIEVE YOU ALL NOW THAT GEOG IS HARDER THAN HISTORY…! Because this year’s Geog teacher is not exactly my fave one. Sigh. Not that the marks are two worlds different, just that my perspective of having Geo classes degraded.  I used to love it when I was in form 1 and 2.
Have you ever felt so lonely as you fall asleep at night, and a couple of tears just trickle down your cheeks out of the sudden, but as you think again you feel that you were being stupid and imagined all those loneliness? haha..
Have I ever said that I started laughing a lot to curb stress, no matter how bad it sounds? Can’t remember. But yeah I am, although it sounds pretty natural to laugh at those times. Or not. Anw…the next topic..
Cravings. Too many a times already. Lydia should know XD
PMR - jia you! It’s gonna be over before we know it ^^

Now I’m really sleepy, dizzy when i move my head a little, but I’m still gonna update this..i don’t know with what, but i’m gonna do it no matter what it costs me!!!…okay, that statement is kind of over the edge, nevertheless..
Although National Day is over, the school is gonna ask us to sing the patriotic songs until mid-month, i suppose..and three weeks after that it’s gonna be all over..It’s gonna be gone in a blink of an eye, and then a couple of months later i can say, "Aiyah, it just PMR..!" XD fun, ain’t it?
I haven’t start to feel exhausted. After all, it’s just the second week of real revision - with breaks every other day. Just that it’s really freaky to have dreams about voluntaring for wars, and then after that a BUS comes to our rescue..really cute x)

It’s seriously close to PMR, now that it’s only a month away. No more computing for hours(and it’s not like i can or want to) anymore..A friend of mine sent me an sms, talking about "Tarikh bersejarah yang tidak dicatat dalam buku teks, 6 Oktober 2006, tamatnya darurat "stay at home and study" etc..haha cute message..and Lydia, with her MSN Messenger message, "1 month…. still very long ma! no need 2 worry. Relax…." she’s a chill pill..

Me : I’m struggling with History. I’m barely 70+ for Geography and KH, even Science..some of the Science questions in the subjective paper is…aarrgh! Unbelievably easy, and i over-analysed it..a 3 marks question gone just like that..oh well doesn’t matter now..

7As. =) =D =S

Yeap, two more days and back to school..Not a very fun week, i suppose. Of course there are exceptions..Wednesday I went to my aunty’s house and Sean and Laura were there!! Ooh what a surprise..really really fun there..including the parts Laura asked me to help her colour some Mickey pictures..Haha oh well today I’m back, and i THOUGHT that we were having the study group thing, but no, we didn’t. No proper plannings, I suppose. It’s OK, since we still hv ONE MONTH before Penilaian Menengah Rendah..Zzz..
So today I planned to clean my room, iron my uniform, and to not eat too much of Coco Crunch so that i won’t get sicker etc. What a great plan for the last weekday holiday[for this week, that is..]

I don’t really remember how long ago was my last post, but i’m back!!!!
Trials are over, and the holidays are here, but here I am stuck at home alone updating my blog.
it’s just sunday though. And today was supposed to be fun. Double the fun. but i end up half sick. Headache, sorethroat, aching, but i think no fever. Cuz if i’m having fever, i wouldn’t be so free doing this. I would be:-

• sleeping with loads of blankets (which i did just now) for much longer than 4 hours
• groaning and sniffing
• drinking loads of water
• grumbling the whole day, although my mom and my brother wouldn’t listen and instead ask me to do all the practical stuff when ur sick. Probably would be scolded anw.
• doing many more things…hahah can’t remember other ‘routines’..

Ahh, i should enjoy every moment of me being half sick XD.Holiday for a week. Then back to school with the exam results. Gotta do smth FUN during holidays!!!! Zhao lou

Oh dear i can’t remember the last time i didn’t have time to rest like the past couple of days! on Saturday morning I went to Jen Ling’s house til 1.30pm for LifeTrek, then to 1Utama, and then went to school at 6pm for the bus ride! to the concert of course.."As You Are" from Calvary Church..it took one hour to go ther but less than 30 minutes back..ahhha great, had fun, many were saved, great music, presentations..i saw one of my old friends [Tiffany] there..and we reached school at about 11.15pm..Fetched Wee Vien home, went mamaking, and then home to sleep….
So the next day i went for the free seminar in KDU College with Poyee, saw Sue Yen and Hui Shien, ate lunch together ‘by the fountainside’ lol and sat a lot in the badly litted hall with lots of orangey people everywhere..haha well, they gave us orange shirts..learned some new stuff [and i've come to know that the Perfection Academy tutors are totally full of 'ideas' to help us remember..espescially math tutor, Mr H.S. Low, he calls himself STIM..LOL..so the cosine, sine and tangent should be remembered like this, Saya=Tak/Homosexual, Kalau=Saya/Homosexual, Tentu=Tak/Stim..haha or the worser one, Saya Tak Handsome, Kalau Saya Handsome. Tentu Tak Suci..omgoodness it was like so natural of all of them to act like that you know! ahahah..but it's really good to [kinda] like catch up with Poyee and all that. Poyee, Sue Yen, and Hui Shien look exactly the same the last time i saw them! it’s great, to be able to see those faces again..=) awww..LOL

Sometimes there’s so many things running through my head at the same time, and that’s how i get stuck starting the blog..and after that, i forget everything..urgh..think think think..

think think think..

Amino’s back, her shell as green as the grass green instead of the old pale green she used to have, must be the ‘vitamins’ in the fish food Wee Vien fed her with..ahaha now it’s Artery’s turn!

think think think..

I’m going to the Calvary Church’s concert, SUR, tmr night, following the bus provided from the church, it’s taking off from me school at 6pm..i suppose i can say many are going, including non-Christians..pray that they will open their hearts to Jesus, knocking on the door..*KNOCK**KNOCK**KNOCK**KNOCK**KNOCK* Open it Laaaa! [ish i sound so gedgil tul! =]

think think think..

I was so ‘dramatically angry’ today [that does not mean i wasn't, just that i'm not..=s] , i closed and locked some of my classmates in the class during Science and English when we needed to go to some other ‘room beside the PSS with lots of curtain’.. PMoral room? Maybe. I don’t plan to find out..hahah..anw, i was ‘dramatically angry’ cuz those people are slow getting out of class, and it’s alwaiz those people =.= but of course i did let them out..if i can i wouldn’t..XD

think think think..

okay think no more, me stop.

ZzZzz..so tired now..
Sooo, today’s the GK Organic Farm trip, was fun, had fun, so fun…..uhhuh, the Mr Gan, the owner, became our "tour guide"..and he explained a lot of stuff to us..they prepared fresh ‘organic’ sugar cane juice for us, and a lot of ‘organic’ papaya while showing us slides..

Mr Gan explaining about the okra..it’s actually from a hibiscus plant you know..ahhah

The sugar cane, papaya, and slideshow part..

And this one is the Farm Lodge, for people who wants to stay there to visit the farm..

We did stayback after the trip in school to practice for the next english oral..yea sort of, and we did!..around 4-ish times, with the script on one hand..haha but we can do it, no probz..=)

hmm, i got the urge to read something so often nowadays..i’m feeling kinda desperate..been reading every survey, every joke [again!], every shout out, so many newspaper articles, life trek 1 modules, etc..and yes bible..what happened to the school text books aahh..? hahaha..
Been playing with Artery alot this two days..guess probably because Amino is not in school with Artery and i arrive so early in school everyday..[i think it's early] Artery made me tell my friends to "act cute!" every time so often..in the science lab, during free times, when scaring, urm, i meant letting Fook Hoy play with the tortoise..HAHAHA..and they do, you know, to entertain my silliness..XD
i still haven’t do my English oral yet..hmm Monday i guess..
YAY Tuesday is the Organic farm trip..we get to miss school, we get to miss school~ haha and then staying back to start practising our group oral..a scene from the Dr Jekyll And Mr Hyde lit book..hehe should be fun..